Early Mother's Day Tribute

This is for all you moms out there and people who just need a laugh. I found this at work.

Why God Made Moms

All answers given by 2nd grade school Children to the following questions

Why did God make Mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house
3. To help us out of there when we are born.

How did God Make Mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like with the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring

What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then mostly string I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're Related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me/

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background, like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spagetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be the boss but she has to because dad is such a goofball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She see the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between mom's and dad's?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you have to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

What does you mom do in her spare time?
1. Mother's don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mother perfect?

1. On the inside she is already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic Surgery.
2. Diet. You know her hair. I'd Diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I would get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

I thought that was funny. Even though I don't have kids of my own, I still can relate. Mike is like my kid, I am constantly nagging him to clean his room!